Happy Friday Archives - Page 2 of 3

The Happy Friday Series: Spring Does Come To New England

05/10/2013 By Jayme Soulati

Credit: Michelle Quillin

Do the changing seasons affect your moods, and by proxy, your productivity and creativity? If you live in an area of the world where winter means months of early darkness, cold nights, and endless bouts of ice and snow, you know all about the winter doldrums. You may even suffer from depression directly tied to the seasons.

I was raised in the deep south, where the seasons are marked not by changing weather, but by major holidays and celebrations. Christmas and New Year’s Eve come in the winter, St. Patrick’s Day and Easter signal spring, the Fourth of July is a summer celebration, and Halloween and Thanksgiving mark autumn. But while holidays and celebrations are a great source of joy for most of us, they’re a harbinger of deep sadness for others, a reminder of loss, or of what’s missing from their lives. Now, tie those winter holidays to a dreary New England winter, and you’ve got a recipe for a real darkness of spirit.

My junior year of high school, my family moved from Georgia to Rhode Island, where I first discovered seasons marked not by holidays and celebrations, but by s eagulls and sailboats in summer, vibrant palettes of gold, red, and orange leaves in the fall, and blankets of deep snow, ice skating, and sledding in the winter.

For many, though, winter isn’t a time for fun, or for the joy of playing outdoors in the long-awaited snow. Instead, winter brings a shutting down, a closing in, and a sleepy, dark hibernation of the soul. And like the trials and hardships that come into every life, winter seems to go on and on, for far too long. The clouds hang heavy and low…

But then, enter spring! Glorious spring! Harbinger of life!

With spring comes the first signs of new birth budding on the barren, storm-battered trees, and sprouting from the still-cold ground, covered in dead debris left there from the previous fall.

Spring in New England brings with it the sights, sounds, and smells of new beginnings. A promise of the veil lifting. A sense of renewal, of opportunity, of change. Change that heralds good.

Resurrection.

A New England spring reminds us that no matter how long or dark a season of life may be, there is always hope. Because just as spring follows winter, after darkness comes light.

Things always get better.

Always.

And hope? It springs eternal.

Credit: Michelle Quillin

What does spring mean for you?

About The Author

Michelle Quillin is chief connectivity officer of New England Multimedia and writes a blog at New England Multimedia. Connect with her on Twitter and Facebook as one of the best around for engagement strategies and search engine optimization.

The Happy Friday Series: Five Seconds And Happy

04/26/2013 By Jayme Soulati

Credit: Brian Meeks, Author

Generally, the last five seconds of the 29th minute of the 10th hour every day are, at best, much like all the rest. Not for me, though. I can tell you what I was doing during those five seconds every Tuesday through Sunday for the last year.

I work in a wholly unremarkable cafe in mid-town.

The list of things I know about her could fit on the side of a coffee cup. She has green eyes. Her hair, black, has gone from short to shoulder length and back. She doesn’t have a favorite coffee, as far as I can tell. Some of the regulars mix it up from time to time, but her order is always a wild card.

The first week I thought she might be a lawyer because of the suits, but then there were shorts, dresses, and once, a gorilla outfit. I asked her, “Are you an actress?”

She said, “No, I’m a gorilla.”

She once wore a black burka and followed it up the next day with a pink one.

She sits in the same booth, if it is available, sets her coffee to the side and looks at her watch. When it is time she closes her eyes, inhales slowly and then exhales. She opens her eyes and that is that. She sometimes reads the paper, does a Sudoku, types away on her laptop, or just stares out the window.

In March and April the sun light floods the booth and her olive skin speaks of angels. It doesn’t matter if I have a customer, I spend those five, precious, favorite seconds, watching her singular breath. The world goes quiet and for 4.9 seconds I can’t look away.

Today, a year of curiosity, distant admiration, and modest stalking came to an end. After the inhale, for no reason, her head turned slightly and she opened her eyes. She caught me. We spent the next 2.5 seconds just looking at one another. It could have been magical, had the next 30 seconds not been a decent into chaos.
***********

What happens next? Meh, we may never know.

What we have here is an example of what makes me happy. It isn’t the story on the whole (or part, as the case may be), but a singular moment within. A moment that the reader never sees. It is between the author and the narrator.

It is a point where the narrator slips something in the writer didn’t see coming, much to both their delights.

That moment…that sneaky little unprepared bit of writing that leaps forward and fills one with the excitement of a first kiss? It is pure joy.

When I read a book I judge it by the number of times I am forced to set it down and marvel at a singular finely crafted passage. Elmore Leonard consistently provides five or more such moments. A good writer will offer up three delicious morsels and I will be fed.

Are you curious? Would you like to know, specifically, where in those 345 words I experience writing euphoria?

Okay, I’ll tell you.

I had thought about this little scene two days ago, while driving from Iowa City to Martelle. All of it, except one part. When I typed, “Are you an actress?” she had, in every instance that I’d imagined it, said, “No.” That was all.

The “I’m a gorilla,” just sort of showed up. It made me chuckle. Did you laugh? I hope so.

But it wasn’t just a laugh line that was the source, it was all that one infers about the type of person who would come up with such an answer. It speaks to her intelligence, as one couldn’t imagine a dullard being so quick. It shows a confidence in what wasn’t said afterwards.

Most people would feel compelled to explain, to answer the unsaid questions, “Why are you wearing a gorilla costume?” but not her. She is quite content to leave it at literal. It is playful and mysterious and, if I may be so bold, sexy as hell.

Is there more to the story? Yes, sure there is. I don’t know what it might be and it may never come to the page, but it’s out there.

****************

Did you enjoy my writing? If so, I’d love to have you as a reader. You can find me at Extremely Average! I write novels as serials.

That is what makes me happy.

Oh, and one more thing. People who subscribe to my blog. They make me doubly happy.

About The Author

Brian Meeks writes a blog at Extremely Average, and his Henry Wood Detective Agency books are published and for sale in paperback and also ebook. He’s been hawking his second book on a blog tour and doing a mighty fine job of it: Check out his Amazon second book.

Official Brian Meeks bio: He is a graduate of Iowa State University with a degree in Economics. He has also written a book about the 1986-87 Iowa Hawkeyes Men’s basketball team titled, Two Decades and Counting: the Streak, the Wins, the Hawkeyes Thru the Eyes of Roy Marble.

The Happy Friday Series: A Chat With Pooh

04/19/2013 By Jayme Soulati

“If I’m going to write about happy,” I explained, “I want that writing to lift the reader to that place – a happy place.”

“Who’s happy?” Pooh asked sympathetically. “Where does happy live?”

“I don’t know – exactly,” I answered.

Pooh looked at me suspiciously.

“You don’t know happy?”

“Happy’s not a person. It’s a thing. It’s a place. It’s how you make me feel. Sometimes. Like when you listen to me – quietly.”

Pooh smiled.

“It’s how the laughter and squeals of children make me feel,” I continued. “Johnny’s smile. Or the first glimpse of a rainbow.

A red, red cardinal chirping good morning to me. A flash of a firefly’s glow on a summer night. The roar of a Porsche at 6000 RPMs.”

“All that?” Pooh asked with surprise and wide-open eyes.

“All that and more,” I enthusiastically answered Pooh – and continued.

“Those first, cautious sips from a hot cup of perfectly brewed coffee – smooth, caramel and uplifting. That brings me to a happy place. Or the fragrant, citrus spray of a bit of orange peel squeezed gently, slowly under the nose.

A morsel of milk chocolate lightly seasoned with hand-harvested sea salt. Fresh bed sheets that were hung outside on a clothesline. These are just a few of my favorite things…

Or the gift of a friend. A lover. Or a stranger. The gift of themselves, their attention and their presence. Priceless!

“Oh! That’s a lot of things,” Pooh said with a heavy sigh. “How much will the postage cost?”

“I don’t know,” I replied as I tried to ignore the implications of Pooh’s question.

Pooh insisted.

“How are you going to get all that stuff here, sorted and portioned? And, then, how are you going to get it all to all of them?”

“I don’t know,” I replied again – but I knew Pooh was right.

Then it came to me – a clever solution. A Joycean epiphany.

“I’ll send it all – all of it and every wonderful detail – in a suggestion,” I told Pooh with excitement.

“And I’ll seal it in a smile.”

Pooh looked at me with suspicion, again.

“That’s… That’s crazy!” blurted Pooh.

“Not as crazy as having a conversation with a stuffed bear…”

Pooh nodded agreement and laughed – in my imagination.

But the real Pooh was actually thinking of something else – a problem that I hadn’t considered.

“But what if they don’t want to go to a happy place?

What if they need to be in the place where they are? A sad place, a serious place or an angry place?”

Pooh had me stumped again.

“Sometimes, we need to be in other places,” Pooh explained.

“Because that’s how we understand and grow – different kinds of learning happen in different places.”

I nodded in silent agreement.

Now, what am I going to do? I wondered to myself.

“I suppose that as long as it’s just a suggestion,” Pooh conceded, “they can take it or leave it. Or better still, they can take it like a gift card; they can redeem it at their convenience; they can visit a happy place whenever they want/like.”

I let out a loud sigh of relief.

“You are a very clever bear,” I said.

“Isn’t that why you talked with me, today?” Pooh asked and grinned.

“To be honest, Pooh, Horton was busy…”

“Horton who?” Pooh asked.

“Horton and the who are two different things. But Horton – if you must know – was busy with a who,” I answered him and lit a cigarette.

“I see,” said a grumpy Pooh.

“Does Horton like and share all your FaceBook posts about Doctor Who, The Walking Dead, and your fan fiction?”

Michonne of The Walking Dead

“No…” I answered.

“But, I’m not as important as Horton,” he added.

“But you are!” I assured him and laughed.

“I was teasing you. Of course, you are important to me, Pooh.”

“I don’t like that kind of teasing,” Pooh replied.

“I’m sorry, Pooh…”

“Don’t do it again,” he warned as he pushed the potato with my face painted on it – off the balcony rail.

Stan Faryna Potato Face

About The Author

Stan Faryna is currently digging 100s of square feet of flower beds for lilies, yarrow, milkweed, and butterfly bushes in his service to Creation. The butterflies, fireflies and hummingbirds should be pleased come summer. Just returned to the US from a long stay in Europe, he’s available for consulting on online strategy, start ups and game development. He’s @faryna on Twitter. He blogs deep here.

Stan Faryna

The Happy Friday Series: Let Go Of Sad

04/12/2013 By Jayme Soulati

What really intrigued me about Jayme’s invitation to write for her Happy Friday series is that for the past couple years I have been on a mission to be more positive. So the first thing I did was scour this wonderful little Happy Friday series she has going and I LOVE it.

One of my favorites was the science of happiness and do-overs by Geoff Reiner. Geoff is in the midst of re-training his brain to be happy, and that’s exactly what I did, but not quite so deliberately and scientifically.

In my mind there are some folks who always have that “glass half full” attitude. I am not one of those people, but I’ve secretly envied them. It took me many, many years to recognize that I come from a family who just seems to see things negatively. There’s always something to worry about, there’s a dark side to everything. Having grown up in that atmosphere, it just seems normal and natural. But when someone points it out to you, then you stop and think.

I thank my husband for being the one to really point this out to me. I honestly didn’t realize how negative my attitude and my outlook could be. I would see faults in people often before I saw positive traits. I’d recognize the down side of a situation without seeing the benefits. For the most part, I was NOT a happy person, even if I seemed it outwardly.

So two years ago, I decided to change that. I bought a journal called “Gratitude” that helped on this journey. Each day had little tips or tricks or positive sayings, or little assignments for the owner to do. For instance, one of the daily assignments was to “find three things that went right in your day and figure out why they went right.”

And so I kept my journal, and made a conscious effort to find and be grateful for little things. I had to teach myself to recognize the positives each day, and even help others see the brighter side of things. Through this, I’ve discovered that sometimes you have to really look for things to be thankful for, but when you do, they’re always there. It also helped me come to a conclusion: happiness doesn’t just happen; it’s something you must choose, and something you have to work at.

And now? I’m SO much happier. I am not saying that every day is a joy, but there are definitely days that would have been much darker if I hadn’t adopted this new approach. It’s still a challenge because it doesn’t come naturally for me. I know I have to make a conscious effort to not dwell on the down side of things and remind myself that it’s important to see the positives in a situation.

If something goes wrong with our house, I now think of how much worse it could have been, and how lucky we are to be able to have this home. Now, when I’m talking to my mother and she’s focusing on the negative, I try to steer her in a more positive direction, rather than wallowing in the negative with her. When my company was having a difficult financial year and said “no raises,” I was thankful I still had a job. When I had a medical issue arise last year, I thought of how much worse it could have been and how lucky I am to have the good health I enjoy.

Through this whole experience, I’ve realized that it’s not how you’re born and raised and it’s not about luck. It’s all in how you look at things and about training your brain to choose the positive, count your blessings, recognize there are things to be grateful for, and find happiness in your everyday life. Because let’s face it… life is way too short to be unhappy.

So, how full is your glass?

About the author

Nancy Jean is a communications and media relations professional now specializing in social media for healthcare. She is currently with the Lifespan health system in Rhode Island, managing social media for five hospitals and a women’s health practice. A lifelong Rhode Islander, she is a mom to two rescue dogs and a diehard Red Sox fan who loves reading, writing, music and the beach. Follow her @NancyCawleyJean.

The Happy Friday Series: Creating Optimism in Traffic on Foursquare

02/01/2013 By Jayme Soulati

It is my great pleasure to welcome Paula Kiger, a 12Most.com author and blogger @BigGreenPen to today’s The Happy Friday Series. This story shows how you can create good vibes no matter where you’re stuck on life’s journey.

Paula Kiger Says:

Once I began using Foursquare, I quickly became intrigued by the check-ins that do more than identify a location. For example, the intersection of Capital Circle Northeast and Centerville Road here in Tallahassee could just be “Capital Circle NE and Centerville Road” but it has been dubbed “The Punishment Light.” I don’t know who created this name, but the wait for the light to turn at this intersection can be punishing, especially for drivers who are running late for work.

I am also a frequent visitor (and checker-inner) at “The Longest Light in Tally” (the intersection of Capital Circle and Apalachee Parkway). I view this check-in as a little “we’re all in this together” nod of commiseration to my fellow Tallahassee drivers who endure interminably lengthy waits at this intersection.

Because of my route to work, the Capital Circle intersection I can guarantee being at daily is the intersection of Capital Circle and Mahan Drive. The light is not quite as long as the two mentioned above, but it’s a major intersection that typically found me fretting about how late I was to work, how I was going to get everything done that I had committed to, how I was going to overcome the problems big and small in my life. It was yet another place to give in to worry and anxiety.

This image is a still shot from Traffic Camera Number 013

Which is why, on my birthday on November 28, I pulled over at a business at that intersection and created my own check-in: The Optimism Light. It is an alternative to the “Capital Circle NE and Mahan Dr.” check-in. It was a gift to myself. Having given myself that gift, it fascinates me how having one small symbolic homage to the positive makes a difference. If I am stopped at a red light there, I check in and take a deep breath. And then I:

Say a brief prayer of gratitude for the indisputably precious gift of another day
Send a positive intention for a friend or someone I know of who is ill or troubled
Give the person in front of me, beside me, or behind me the vibe that “it’s okay – we’ll all get where we’re going” instead of “what’s taking you so long to MOVE?!”
Hope that hope will prevail in the face of the world’s darknesses

I would be lying if I wrote, “and if no one else ever checked in here, that would be fine – I created this for myself.” Honestly, I want others to check in there (and I appreciate those FourSquare users who have). It’s why I tweet and post to Facebook every time I check in there.

When I find quotes that apply to this check-in, I add them as “tips.” They’re brief enough to take in while waiting for the light to turn:

Around 50,000 cars pass through this intersection every day. You could argue that taking two seconds to give your fellow driver a break or say a quick prayer/intention (whatever your faith tradition) for someone else is not even a drop in the bucket. But, in my opinion, 50,000+ drops could create some waves of tranquility.

And in a world where it’s all too easy to make waves with sarcasm and vitriol, waves of optimism surely couldn’t hurt any of us.

(Jayme Note: The Happy Friday series seeks new guest authors. What makes you happy? Please share with me, and you can be my featured guest!)

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